In the United States of America, everyone is born with the name Natasha.

As they grow older, they are shipped to different schools, each with different names according to their aptitudes.

For example, children who are good with paint go to the Pablo elementary school. From there they might graduate to a number of secondary schools with more specialized names, such as Leonardo, Michael, Vincent, Salvador, etc.

It's difficult for professions that didn't exist prior to 1643 (the founding date of the United States of America).

There are no schools for these professions. Children who are adept at, for example, combinatorics must be home schooled, as they have no birth certificates.

The Republicans (George) and Democrats (Bill) all agree that they are scared of nameless and therefore futureless children.

Some of these children have grown up with false names, such as Mark, or Jeff, or Jon.

But legally they have none.